what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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