I'm jealous of your bromance
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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