What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
