This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
