Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'm getting married
To pizza
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
