Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize