So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
