so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
