BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I am one with the molecules
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
