My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Is it penis luge time yet?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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