Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
