we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize