dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
