In the future we'll all be gay
oh god the rape fog is back!
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
