Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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