elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
