Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
