who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
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