oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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