There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
