I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
