I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize