3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
This house was built for laser tag.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
