Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
