You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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