They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
