I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
