who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize