i would punch a child for taco bell
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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