They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
