he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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