have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
