come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
