I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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