i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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