There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Acid is not a monday night drug
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Randomize
