im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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