They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
