his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
