I just threw up on my dentist
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Randomize
