she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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