R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Randomize
