is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
