Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
