I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
