I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
