Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
