We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
