she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
