rhymes with "ouble enetration"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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