Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
