It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
