people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
